Tension is based on Inner Conflict
Tension is a common experience in our daily lives, often manifesting as physical discomfort, mental stress, or emotional unease. While it is easy to attribute tension to external circumstances — such as work pressure, relationship issues, or financial worries — its roots are often much deeper, embedded within the layers of our inner being. At its core, tension is born from inner conflict, a clash between our desires, beliefs, fears, and the reality we perceive.
Inner conflict arises when different aspects of our psyche are at odds with one another. This could be a conflict between our conscious mind, which seeks control and order, and our subconscious mind, which harbours unresolved fears, desires, and emotions. For example, we might consciously want to succeed in our careers, but subconsciously, we may fear failure or harbour doubts about our capabilities. This dichotomy creates a push-and-pull effect within us, leading to tension.
One of the most profound sources of inner conflict is the disparity between who we are and who we think we should be. Society, family, and even our own self-expectations often impose ideals and standards that we feel compelled to meet. When there is a gap between our true self and these imposed ideals, inner conflict arises. We may struggle to reconcile our authentic desires and feelings with the expectations placed upon us, leading to a state of chronic tension. This tension is not just mental; it permeates our entire being, affecting our physical health, emotional stability, and spiritual well-being.
Another source of inner conflict stems from our resistance to reality. Often, we cling to certain expectations or outcomes, refusing to accept what is. This resistance creates a constant state of tension as we battle against the flow of life. For instance, we may be deeply attached to a particular outcome, such as a job promotion or a relationship working out in a specific way. When reality does not align with our expectations, we experience disappointment, frustration, and tension. This conflict between our desires and reality is a significant source of inner turmoil.
Moreover, inner conflict can arise from unresolved emotional wounds. Past experiences, especially those involving pain, betrayal, or trauma, can leave deep scars on our psyche. When these wounds are not fully healed, they continue to influence our thoughts, emotions, and behaviours, often in ways we are not consciously aware of. The tension we feel in such cases is a manifestation of these unresolved issues, calling our attention to the need for healing and reconciliation within ourselves.
Tension also manifests when our actions are not in harmony with our values and beliefs. For example, if we value honesty but find ourselves in situations where we feel compelled to lie or deceive, this creates inner conflict. The dissonance between our actions and our inner values generates tension, as we struggle to align our external behaviour with our internal moral compass.
The path to resolving tension lies in addressing the inner conflicts that give rise to it. This begins with self-awareness — recognising and acknowledging the conflicts within us. Mindfulness and meditation are powerful tools in this process, allowing us to observe our thoughts, emotions, and behaviours without judgment. Through this practice, we can identify the sources of our inner conflict and understand how they contribute to the tension we experience.
Once we have identified these conflicts, the next step is to work towards resolving them. This may involve letting go of unrealistic expectations, healing past wounds, or aligning our actions with our values. It may also require us to embrace our true selves, accepting both our strengths and weaknesses, and releasing the need to conform to external standards that do not resonate with our authentic being.
Ultimately, the resolution of inner conflict and the release of tension are not about eliminating challenges or avoiding difficulties. Rather, it is about finding harmony within ourselves — cultivating a sense of inner peace and alignment that allows us to navigate life’s ups and downs with grace and equanimity. By addressing the inner conflicts that underlie tension, we can create a more balanced and fulfilling life, rooted in a deep connection to our true selves.
